When space is silence…

Words, sounds, and space…

Dark, bleeding, noiseless days

25 Comments

i.
Monday was dark  
         scented with coffee  
lethargic  
         as northern fog  

ii.
Thursday
         –you said
can let those colours bleed
         –I stared

iii.
Today is noiseless
         only peaceful whispers
interrupt
         with inky voices


_____Adriana Citlali
XV-I-MMXV

The words I just wrote are my first try at tenWord poetry –a form invented by Brian Miller.

In Brian’s words:
“I call this one tenWord, because after ten words no one is listening anyway, or already formulating their response…and what can you say in ten words…”

 
dVerse.

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Author: Adriana Citlali Ramírez

A citizen of the world, born in Mexico city... A physicist (working as a geophysicist) and a part-time artist (creative writing, oil/acrylic painting, photography)… All posts and poems ©Adriana Citlali Ramírez. All rights reserved.

25 thoughts on “Dark, bleeding, noiseless days

  1. Your word capture living in a Nordic country perfectly.. the first one including the coffee, really make you understand how we manage.

  2. wednesday was icy & cold,
    different than the coffee warming me.

    glad you got the whispers
    in tenwords & well beyond.

  3. I am shivering with that northern fog ~ Good job with the tenwords limit ~

  4. I like the ideas of coffee, colours, and whispers..

  5. Your words are breath-taking and just amazingly written.

    I love this poem by you.

  6. Definitely can feel the cold and bleakness of a winter day. You really capture the mood in this one.

  7. i like the progression in this and the sensory words

  8. I like how you convey a kind of muffled winter atmosphere in your poems. I take it you are still in Norway. The first one is my favorite.

  9. Kind of an exotic foreign flavor to this one; very cool take on the ten Word prompt; excellent summation/description of a Scandinavian wintry bleakness; I felt your last stanza was killer.

  10. wow… you manage well to capture the feel of a day in just few words..

  11. Oh! I loved that second one. Well-penned. 🙂
    -HA

  12. I love these vivid images.

  13. Goodness, I suddenly smelled coffee!

  14. I love those dark days, each one!

  15. These are just perfectly lovely, and in their briefness still read as poetry should read. Well done!

  16. Love the imagery of the whispers and inky voices!

  17. I especially like the first one Adriana–creative and evocative! Thanks .k.

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